Graduate School: The Game!

Hey kids, check out the cool new game that's sweeping the nation!  Be the first on your block to own a copy of Graduate School: The Game from TenureCo, the makers of such classics as "Rush Hour Madness," "My First Blue Book Exam," "Little Lawyer," and "Johnny Tax Auditor."

With Graduate School: The Game you can experience all the fun and realism of grad school in the comfort of your own home.  Every nuance of the real graduate experience is reproduced in this game.  The game takes you through the whole process:

• application
• acceptance
• classwork
• boring talks
• confusing talks
• incomprehensible talks
• research
• data analysis
• psychoanalysis
• depression
• social isolation
• authorship battles
• job hunting

And so much more!

Call all your friends over for years of wholesome fun.  Check out these great features:

Choose Your Own Character

You have your choice of a wide variety of characters: 

Jill: the emotionally unstable ABD

Fred: the naive first-year

Harold: the overwhelmed and under-funded RA

Laura: the disgruntled TA

Jaques: the exploited international student

Backstabbing Caroline: the political opportunist

And many, many more...

Confront a Wide Array of Interesting Opponents

Throughout your quests in strange and exotic lands you will encounter
people who apparently receive great joy at your misfortune, in fact they
are a major cause of this misfortune:

Administress: the evil secretary with her dreaded red tape

Prof. Rewrite: if he gets on your committee you're doomed

Metoo: A fellow grad student who becomes a dead weight on all your projects

Ronny: The smelly undergrad RA who scares all your subjects away

Partytime Pamela: Invites you to time-wasting parties every other night

Prof. Touchy-Feely: A sexual harrassment case waiting to happen

Rod Starr: Super Grad Student, makes you look bad by graduating in 12 days

Susan Stickyfingers: Your kleptomaniac officemate

Along with dozens of others!

Real Life Challenges

Pick a Setback Card and see what fun adventures await you:

Join a Committee:  Research slows down 1/2

Videogame attack:  Lose 12 turns playing Snood

One More Analysis:  Repeat all previous analyses

Dissertation Scooped:  Go back to "new candidate" status

Get Drunk at a Conference:  Spin the Faculty Insult Wheel for your penalty

Advisor Retires/Moves/Changes Interests:  Start over

Car Towed:  Sell your stereo to get it out of hock, lose motivation

To name just a few!

Different Ways to Finish

Most games are boring.  They have a "winner" and a bunch of "losers."  The goal of Graduate School: The Game is different. There are no winners in grad school; only survivors and failures.  Your goal is to be a survivor, that means different things to different people.  There are a wide range of ways to survive:

Go to law school:  Successfully escape

Marry rich:  Don't worry anymore

Find God:  Science is for fools

Family:  Change your priorities

Capitalize on one of your ideas and make millions:  Ah, engineering...

Graduate: ???

Graduate School: The Game -- Look for it in stores near you!